There is a time in my teenage years, Ego by Beyonce used to play a lot on Kiss 100. “It’s too big, it won’t fit, he has a huge ego, I love his big ego!” I know most of us had a different understanding of this song and the ideas running in our minds were wild and I am sure it still is. I’m not going to lie Kiss was the bomb those days. I had no idea what ego was, but my mind had other ideas let us not dwell on that it is not important. Anyway, I have studied psychology in my past years and we passed through the topic but understanding based on real-life experience is way better don’t you agree?
According to the Google search engine, ego is a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance or a broader meaning; Ego is the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity. Let’s go with the first one it is easier. If you realize there is some bullshit you cannot take, that’s what we call ego in our layman’s language. For example, a person can come and maybe make fun of something and your ego will not let you find it funny. In your mind, your ego will be speaking to you telling you how that is so disrespectful and it will be giving you ideas on how you can react to it.
There is a time when my age mates were pretending to be mature and when you were in the talking stage ‘mtu anaamua kusema ati; I don’t like people who step on my ego.’ If someone told me this I would always wonder if it is the same ego on Beyonce’s song or what was this ego people were talking about. I was a slow learner when I was growing up.
In Boondocks, where the nigga moment happened and grandad fought with ‘Colonel Stinkmeaner’ do you think grandad used his ego to fight that little blind rude old man until he killed Stinkmeaner, or did he use his balls(testosterone) for the decision? My opinion is he used both of them, his ego pushed his testosterone to its limit and he fought with all his might. All of us are born with Ego but how you can prevent it from going over your head is what matters.
Can we get rid of ego if we wanted to? I don’t think so. An article by Sadhguru says; “Ego” is not something that you got because you did something well or because you became rich or beautiful or anything else. When you started kicking in your mother’s womb, the ego was born. The very first mistake of getting identified with your physical body means the ego was born. It is a defense mechanism. All of us have it, even ladies but for us, it’s more on competition, how we perceive ourselves. We tend to put ourselves at the center of our world.
There are some certain men we deem as our types and if a man does not meet the specifications of the type of men we want, it will be hard and the probability is zero for the men who do not meet the qualification to be attractive to us.
The thing with Ego is if you cannot control it well it will break you. If it is too much it will stop you from growing, pushes people away from you, be competitive in an unhealthy way, especially for ladies, makes you irrational this is true, especially in men, kills your happiness, makes you greedy, and adds stress on you. Ego is not a bad thing as much as it has its downfalls there are positive sides to it. When you are channeling ego to develop a stronger sense of self, it’s quite empowering. It gives you the state of mind to attempt more bold, daring, and, adventurous things. And gives you greater confidence that you can achieve them. This is according to research.
It allows you to take risks and allows you to clarify your perception of life. Don’t be a Beyonce’s Ego type of person, read between the lines of Ego and try to tame it as your slave. Since I am no expert in this kind of thing the little understanding that I have put out for you is what I hope will help you understand why ego, is that you?
I LOVE YOU BY THE WAY!
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